


Scars beyond the body

by ThatsAllPeachy



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Other, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-18
Packaged: 2019-04-01 09:17:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13995174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatsAllPeachy/pseuds/ThatsAllPeachy
Summary: When Ford has to come upstairs he expects some bonding time with Mabel, and he does bond with her, but afterwards things go south. Hey, this has self-harm mentions in it, I can't make you do anything, but if you are a child, or if that triggers you I recommend you read something else. This is angsty?? But it will be resolved in the next couple of chapters i guess lmao. Sorry I'm not very professional in summaries.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Angst angst angst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hey, the little voice in your head, the one that tells you that you're terrible and no good...it goes away right? It's just a dumb teenage girl thing right?

Ford glanced up at the clock situated on my desk as he reviewed the additions to his journal.

Sighing, he took off his glasses to rub his eyes and squint. 

_ 5:40pm _

Stanford hadn’t eaten anything in nearly 7 hours. It was a bad habit, not eating. Heck, it was a habit that had kept with him for nearly 40 years. But he had been so consumed by his work, that he had forgotten. Again. 

Stan, Dipper, and Soos had left to see a monster truck rally. Ford had planned to spend his afternoon mentoring with Dipper, but the monster truck rally had intervened with those plans. 

_ It’s not like I won’t have other times to spend with him. _

He thought about Mabel upstairs. He had supposed to be watching her, but she assured him that it was alright to finish his work. That was nearly 4 hours ago.

A small tint of red rushed over him, Ford felt guilty that one small paragraph he had hoped to record in his journal had grown into a full-blown drawing and description. After the events of Weirdmageddon, he had silently sworn that he would try and stop sheltering himself from his family.

_ After all, it was pushing away your loved ones that caused the whole mess you dumbass _

   Ford sighed and put his journal down. His stomach was starting to growl. He ignored his self-loathing and began to focus on something else, like his lonesome niece upstairs.

“I should probably go check on her.” He mumbled to himself. He heard several loud pops as he stretched and got out of the chair to make sure Mabel hadn’t accidentally done something like swallow toxic glitter or wander out of the house without his consent.

As he neared ground level, the dampness of the basement started to shift back to the coziness of the shack. 

He ran his fingers through his tangled and messy hair.

_ Jesus, when was the last time I even brushed my hair? _

When he finally emerged from the back of the vending machine, Mabel was sitting on the ground, Waddles the pig sleeping soundly next to her. She snapped her head towards him before going back to her papers.

Ford smiled at her awkwardly as he neared the fridge. Curious, he tried to catch a glimpse of the drawing, but she hastily moved her hand over the drawing.

“Hi Grunkle Ford, you doing alright down there? I know Sciencey lab stuff can wear a person out.” She said cheerfully. 

Ford thought back to how he was writing a long paged summary of what can only be described as a “Giant flying hagfish with horns” he had encountered in a dimension where those creatures were primarily dominant. He cursed himself silently.

_ I can’t believe I would rather spend my time alone writing about monsters than spend time with my niece. How pathetic I am. _

“Yes, I’m quite well Mabel, I actually came up to check on you dear, are you alright?” He responded. 

“Oh yea, I’m...doing good, Just coloring.” She said, shifting some papers so that a drawing of a teddy bear with rainbow eyes was at the top of the stack, to which only then did she allow Ford to see the art.

_ I wonder why she doesn’t want me to see that drawing underneath that one. _

But he brushed it off, as a child, he wouldn’t want his parents looking at some of his drawings too. He remembered the time Stanley had shown one of his best pieces to his Dad, only to be mocked because of a flaw in his linework.

Ford walked to the refrigerator, opening it only to find 2 eggs, spoiled milk, and a single peanut. Peanuts didn’t even need to be refrigerated. 

He sighed. “Stanley really needs to consistently restock the fridge.” 

“Yea, one time he used spoiled milk in his cereal because he thought the expiration date was a lie so stores could sell more milk and scam people. He had food poisoning for like, a week!” She recalled, laughing.

Ford chuckled at this.

“That sounds like Stan alright.” He tried to think of something else to say before Mabel spoke to prevent awkward silence. “Anyways, I wouldn’t drink that milk in there if I were you.” She colored another stripe onto a piece of paper before adding “You probably weren’t going to, sorry.”

Ford frowned, tossing the half-empty carton in the trash. “There's nothing to be sorry about dear.” She stared at him briefly before she went back to coloring, an awkward silence settling between them.

It seemed like Mabel would do that more than she had the summer prior, constantly apologizing. In fact, a lot of things seemed off this summer. She seemed more reserved than last time...Not to say she wasn’t energetic still, Mabel just spent a lot less time being herself and more time being...alone. 

Perhaps Weirdmageddon had left more wounds than Mabel let on.

Ford wanted to brush it off, he had done some mental evaluations on the kids, and nothing had seemed out of the ordinary, at least not when he had  _ done _ the evaluations. 

_ Besides, If she wanted to talk about anything she would, besides, she’s closer to Stanley anyway, she probably doesn’t even love you as much as she loves him _

He walked over next to her.

“Wouldn’t you rather sit at the table?” He asked.

“Nah, the floor is where all the fun is at!” She said, as waddles scavenged for crayons to nibble on.

“Haha, you’re a hunk.” She said as the pig chewed a brown crayon to shreds.

Ford smiled. He stood there, debating whether his niece would mind if he sat there.

“Do you want to draw too, Grunkle Ford?” She finally asked.

“I’d be delighted to.” He said as he sank to the ground.

“Here, take this!” She said as she slid a paper and pencil over to him.

“Thanks.” He muttered, trying to find a way to sit comfortably and draw at the same time. Finally, he gave up and laid on the ground on his stomach, like his niece was.

He started sketching a griffin. He felt a pair of eyes drift to his paper.

“Grunkle Ford how come you’re so talented with a pencil??”

“My dear it isn’t talent, I have many years of sketching practice. Practice makes perfect.” He said the last few words in a singsong voice. He felt like a kid again, laying on the ground and sketching to his heart's desire. He always did whenever he drew. 

Mabel took a few moments to respond. 

“You think I could be a good artist with practice?” She whispered.

Ford grinned. “You’re already pretty amazing, don’t you think?” He waited for her usual happy response to praise, but instead, he was faced with a silence he was trying to avoid.

  
  


An hour had passed and their creations lay nearly finished, Ford’s Griffin and Mabel’s bear-cat hybrid settling on the paper quite naturally, which was ironic considering the fact that the two beasts were so...unnatural

Mabel smiled widely, clearly proud of the finished product.

“Wow, these turned out really nicely, don’t you think?.” Mabel observed with a grin on her face.

“I think so.” He replied back cheerfully.

Mabel studied Ford’s drawing, her smiling fading a little bit. 

_ Man, your drawings is so stupid and childish. He probably only stayed upstairs cause he felt sorry for you,stinkface _

Mabel tried to shake that thought away. She often had these thoughts ever since she had come back from Mabelland. Ever since she had caused the rift to smash. Weirdmageddon had really left a mark. 

_ No, it was Bill who smashed it _

_ Yea but you gave Bill the rift, dummy _

_ But he tricked you! _

_ Well maybe if you were smarter… _

When Dipper vented to her about his apparent nightmares, she thought her problems seemed insignificant, so she locked the thoughts away to the deepest depths of her mind.

Thoughts such as

_ You’re so stupid. _

_ Nobody likes you. _

_ Dipper wouldn’t be having nightmares if you didn’t cause the rift to break. _

_ You’d be better off gone. _

She snapped back to reality. Ford had a wavering smile on his face.

“You alright there dear?” He asked sympathetically.

_ Great. Now he thinks you’re some kind of stupid spaced out kid. _

“I’m fine.” She muttered yawning.

“...Hey, you would come to me if anything was bothering you right dear? I know I’m no Stanley but if you need someone to confide in I’m always available.” He patted her back reassuringly.

“Whaaaaaat??! I’m totally friggity friggity fine.” She assured him, straining a smile onto her face.

“Are you s-” He started to say before Mabel cut him off.

“I’m going to get my paints.”

She ran up to the attic to avoid any further questions.

Five minutes later she was back on the floor, paint bottles nearly slipping out of her grasp.

“Alrighty well, I’m going to paint my drawing.”

Ford closely watched as she started to roll up her sleeves to prevent any color splashing her sweater, but instantly regretted it. She totally forgot what was under the sleeve.

Scars. Some old, some new. Ranging from tiny little cuts to long, shaky to smooth. Some of them old, some new. 

She heard her great-uncle audibly gasp.

Mabel quickly pulled down her sleeves.

“Where are those from?!” He shakily asked, but from the horrified expression on his nieces face his fears had been confirmed.

“I uh..well you see-” She stuttered, looking for something to focus on. 

She couldn’t meet her uncle’s eyes. Mabel suddenly got up hastily and ran for the attic, dodging the Shack’s many attractions to get there quick.

“Mabel! Wait I just want to help-” Ford yelled at her.

The slam of the attic door echoed throughout the Mystery Shack.

 


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ford has a mental breakdown before confronting Mabel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please do not read if you are sensitive to PTSD, scars, anxiety, or any other mental illnesses. This chapter has a lot of mention of violence so read at your own risk

Ford desperately tried to steady himself against a nearby wall. He couldn’t think straight, not with the newfound discovery of his. 

_ Scars.Scars that aren’t accidents. _

He stumbled towards the attic steps, urgently trying to make his way up the stairs.

_ Was it because of the events during Weirdmageddon? _

He knew that Mabel didn’t know him like he knew Dipper, heck, he knew he probably would never reach the same level of connection that Stanley and her shared. In fact, Ford had thought she had hated him because he had asked her brother to be his apprentice.

_ Maybe if you weren’t so gullible in the first place, maybe if you didn’t place your trust in Bill 36 years ago you wouldn’t be in this mess... _

_ But no, that’s all you’re good for, making a mess out of things. _

Ford gulped for air as the world grew shaky. His niece’s scars reminding him so much of his own. He knew this feeling awfully well. He was having an anxiety attack, memories hitting him like a brick.

  
  


\-----------------

 

**A huge, black beast scratched thin nails against his skin, cutting the already ruined tissue open. His arms were raw and bright red.**

**Blood flowed freely down his arms.**

**He could not do anything, he was restrained. He was trapped.**

 

**He gasped in pain as the creature began to repeat the ordeal several more times. Tears threatened to spill out of the corners of his eyes.**

 

\-----------------

 

_ 123 _

_ Your name is Stanford Pines _

_ You are not in another dimension anymore, _

_ You were drawing with your niece 10 minutes ago. _

_ Bill is dead _

_ ….You have a family _

_ \------------------ _

Waking up from a dream that seemed like it would never end, Ford began to take a hold of reality, reminiscing the encounter he had with Mabel moments before.

He began to think of ways he could try to talk to his niece.

He couldn’t  just barge in and hope he would say something that would automatically make things okay. That’s not how things work.

Being sensitive...was not Ford’s speciality to say the least. Heck, talking about emotions was a thing he had struggled with even as a little boy. Ford could calculate an algebraic expression in seconds, but when it came to social skills he had to have more time. 

He climbed up the attic stairs, slowly but surely, prolonging his time to the twins room to think about his words. Finally, he hesitated opening the door to their room. Ford took a deep breath and knocked 3 times before saying:

“Mabel? Are you in there?”

Silence. Of course. 

“..Mabel?” He pursued.

“Mabel is taking a stroll through sweater town.” Said a muffled voice from the other side of the door. 

Ford pushed open the door, his eyes immediately racing to find his niece.

He turned his head until his eyes finally found her at the far corner of her room.

She had the neck of her sweater pulled all the way up to her head and was rubbing her arms profusely. There was a weird feeling in his stomach, nearly making him clench it. The sight of this person so deeply scarred, both mentally and physically. 

Ford walked over to the corner where she sat, sinking to the floor with her.

A couple of minutes past before she said anything, before she  _ could  _ say anything.

“...Am I in trouble?” Mabel mumbled through the fabric.

Ford wanted to yell, and get mad, to be completely honest. He wanted to ask why she would even consider hurting herself.  He scowled. 

But he couldn’t bring himself to get mad. Especially when this person needed help. Ford needed to be sensitive, to be aware of what he was saying for once.

He sighed.    
“No...You’re not. “ He managed after a while. Ford put his arm around his niece.

“Mabel did you...did you harm yourself recently?” He finally questioned.

She fidgeted, hands scratching at her sweater.

_ Thats a yes. _

Ford fumbled with his words, what was he supposed to say?

“If this is about last summer...I just want you to know that wasn’t your fault alright? I know a lot of people tell you that bu-” He was caught off by his niece, finally pulling the neck of her sweater down, showing her face. She wouldn’t meet his eyes.

“I know that alright? It’s just hard to believe it when you know you’re terrible. It’s like there is this voice in my head that says I am a terrible person, no matter what I do or how happy I try to seem. But it's not just because of the thing with Bill” She said, nearly choking.

_ You did this to her. You made this sweet, optimistic little girl hate herself. It is your fault. _

_ “ _ I gave him the rift you know, he tricked me, but I still gave it up. I feel so dumb.” She whispered.

Ford started to say something, but it was clear she wasn’t done.

“And it’s like...I hate myself no matter what I do to not hate myself?” She finally finished.

Ford was quiet before he responded.

“I know that feeling...The self loathing.” He said. 

“But no matter what the voice in your head says, you know it’s wrong right? I know it seems like you can’t do anything about it now, but I promise it’ll get better. There’s no need to punish yourself. Please come see me or Stanley when you think about that, Mabel. I don’t want you in danger.” He rambled on about therapy options before he realized he was ranting. He finally shut up when he noticed that she stopped fidgeting with her arm sleeve.

Mabel went quiet, before climbing onto her surprised uncle’s lap.

He felt weird, this kind of physical contact was still relatively new to him, but he adjusted and hugged Mabel.

She buried her face into his maroon sweater, trying to cover up the tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for coming to my ted talk. Please leave a comment to encourage me to write, it helps a lot. Also, no this is not the end of the work. Sorry for the sorta short chapter.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, if you want more of this I suggest you leave a comment, reading those lovely comments always motivates me to write!


End file.
